I realized something tonight, that I guess I knew all along.  People are always wearing masks.  It hit home when I heard one of my friends criticizing the work of another friend, a few days after I heard her complementing that friend for the same work, all because of the opinions of the people around her.  It makes me wonder, what masks do I wear?

The dutiful daughter, the faithful Christian, the dedicated worker, the carefree kid.  I wear so many masks I don’t even know who I am.  I wish I did.

It just seems like we as humans are always trying to fit into our niche, most of us do that by taking what we admire in others and trying to apply it to ourselves.  I try and copy a certain persons fashion, or carriage, or speech mannerisms.

For the majority of my life I’ve been trying to copy others to fit in, or to fit into the role they cast me in…usually the hyperactive fool.  Many times I go into situations thinking I’m finally going to act like I want to act, but then i slip back to the role they expect me to fill.  So I’m saying screw it, I like the way I draw, I’m not changing it for you.  I like the books I read, even if they’re kids books.  I like the way I dress, even if you don’t.  And I believe what I believe.  I’m not going to shatter your world to embrace mine, but I’m not going to fit myself into the roles others expect of me.  I’m going to try and be me, whoever that ends up being.

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